Nintendo\’s E3 plans have leaked! As you can tell from the tilted, blurry picture attached here, we at Nintendo Enthusiast have obtained the super-duper secret line-up for Nintendo\’s plans at E3. Our source told us they are definitely legitimate and we\’ve been lucky enough to receive a detailed breakdown of what you can expect to see this June. Attached below is a scanned version of the list.


Hideo Kojima is expected to present the Smash Bros. section of the show — perhaps this means Solid Snake is confirmed for Super Smash Bros. Wii U & 3DS? Maybe Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain is confirmed for Wii U? Popular artist Usher has betrayed Microsoft and is now presenting Hyrule Warriors on stage, following with Just Dance: Metroid Edition, where you take control of Samus as she boogies around the galaxy, but only when she is authorised to do so. Nintendo President himself, Satoru Iwata, is presenting another new version of Urban Champion, now in HD. The game has no additional changes nor any of the original glitches fixed as to \”preserve the original as much as possible.\” This, of course, is set for a release with full retail price.


Moving on to the Virtual Console, GameCube games are finally making their way to the Wii U before Nintendo 64 games. The console will receive one new GameCube game every six months, meaning the console will have about three GameCube games in total. The first title is Radical Entertainment\’s The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction. A new crossover is also in the works. Nintendo will be taking two of its no-longer relevant franchises, Star Fox and F-Zero, and mash them together in the hopes that their combined fan bases will buy enough copies to justify it being made. We can also see that Miyamoto is set to reveal his new IP, though if it\’s revealed now, it probably means we will finally see a release in about five years\’ time.

Nintendo of America\’s Reggie Fils-Aime — not his robot version — is set to talk about the Wii U\’s third-party titles, which of course, there are none, so who better to spin the news than the man himself? Geoff Keighley is set to interview and grill Reggie on everything Nintendo, which he\’s sure to dodge and not answer at all. Other announcements include The Second Year of Luigi — as if one wasn\’t bad enough, we now have a second year of the green menace to enjoy, with brand new Luigi games including Luiginetta 2, Luigi Warriors and Call of Luigi: Toad Warfare. Metroid Party U shakes up the Mario Party formula, using characters from the Metroid series like Samus, Dark Samus, Zero Suit Samus, Adam, and Metroid. There will be no Ridley because he\’s too big for the board.


Much like Nintendo, the list makes no mention of titles revealed a year ago, such as Shin Megami Tensei X Fire Emblem or Yarn Yoshi, which only adds to its legitimacy. My source also tells me that the recently posted The Legend of Zelda: Shard of Nightmare leaks you may have seen recently are indeed fake and the title is actually called The Legend of Zelda: Magical Item #531. Pokken Fighters is also set to make an appearance, utilising the Wii U\’s Near Field Communication feature. Figurines will soon go on sale of all 719 Pokémon, as well as each one having a special individual \”shiny\” version, bringing the figurine total close to 1,500.


That\’s all we have for today, I\’m afraid. Our anonymous source tells us that he works closely with Reggie and Nintendo of America, but after being sent to Japan, he\’s getting revenge on his boss — hence the leak. Nintendo Enthusiast will be sure to keep you updated on all things Nintendo at this year\’s E3. Feel free to discuss your thoughts in the comments. What do you make of these announcements? Does the thought of a Luigi-themed Bayonetta give you nightmares?

(If you still hadn\’t realised, yes, this is an attempt at humour.)
(Also I actually love ZI I\’ve worked there before <3)

Written by Daniel Switzer

18 year old video game critic who occasionally attempts to be funny. It doesn’t always work. Contributor for multiple sites, special admiration for Nintendo games. Contact me via Twitter @daniel_switzer

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